finally an IDKE post-FRIDAY: conference

happy halloween yall. get yerself a beverage, this is a long ass post.

i am so sorry it has taken me nearly two weeks to post about IDKE 8 in Austin.
i always have such a hard time getting back into the swing of things and work and life have been more hectic than usual.
so lets get to it. i am going to do this day by day. that is the only way it is manageable for me.
in my last post, you will find the pictures i took on thursday at the meet and great. they are mostly of the folks i was staying with, so i am not going to re-post them here. overally, the meet and greet was fun. we had a few drinks and went home fairly early b/c folks had to be at work the next day and i knew that friday was going to be a full day for me.

so the first thing i attended on friday was the "butch on butch" panel put on by amber billey, debbie linn and sam bryer from chicago. we had a problem parking, so we got there late, but luckily they were just finishing up introductions. you were basically supposed to say your name and one word (or phrase) that you thought of when you thought of butch. i said "hot."

the room was really full with folks sitting on the floor and crowding in. what i was most taken by was the generational diversity of the group. walking into the room, the first thing i saw was a number of what i would call "old school" butches or studs, you know the folks who fought the fight long before i even figured out i was queer. that felt really good. i was also really excited that there was a discussion of the difference between "stud" and "butch" and how race and culture influence the understanding of those two words. one person, from st. louis (maybe?) said something like "look, i am 36 years old and i still identify as a stud, butch is something i aspire to be one day, its a process." i just liked the way that s/he articulated a history that many of us forget. overall it was a very lively discussion. i also liked this one younger person who talked about working in a deli with other liberal and/or queer types and how because s/he is the most "butch looking" person there, folks expect hir to take out the trash and shit. just a nice way to talk about the expectations of masculinity. it was a rich discussion. i am glad i went.

after that, i went to the "making history: documenting our performance cultures & communities" panel by julie applegate, christa (simon) and alana kumbier. it was interesting to hear all the projects that have been done and are being done by folks to save all the memories created both at IDKE and in their own communities. they passed out this great little zine that is a wonderful "how to" archive your own work. they also let us know about a blog that you can post to. its address is:

www.idkearchives.blogspot.com

they asked that folks cross post their posts about IDKE 8 there. i plan to. i missed a good part of the end of the talk b/c i was helping this random woman with her two adorable twin babies. i forget their names by now, but they were about 7 months old and girls and adorable. one was skinnier and very wiggly and one was chubbier and more chill. when the wiggly one got REAL wiggly and sort of loud, i asked the mom if she needed help occupying the chill one (who started to get a little not so chill) so all hell wouldn't break loose. she handed me chillbaby and she immediately became mesmerized by my long luxurious locks (read: my stringy greasy straight hair) and my chin. with my help, the mom lady (who was from austin) was able to stay through most of the panel. we bid our adieus outside the room when the babies really started fussing. so many people asked me if those were my babies. i was like "nope, i was just an instant nanny."

If you have any questions about archiving, please contact one or all of the following people:

Julie Applegate/Jake Wakeman: vespadyke@yahoo.com
Alana Kumbier/Redrider: dragarchivist@yahoo.com
Christa Orth/Simon LeBongo: christamae@yahoo.com

they are smart folks and they can help you.

after that i had lunch and hung out a bit with my new friend jodi bon jodi who is on the idke board. then i headed to the film shorts. some of my favorites were:

1. "the sea calls us home" by annie simpson- because trevor endeavor was in it. hot.

2. "les maladventures de zut-alors" by jeanne stern- the whole thing is about these two sort of party blower sock puppets. fucking ingenious and hilarious.

3. "miggy n lil" by bug davidson-weird but engaging film about this butcher who falls for this femmey hustler girl. i am not sure i completely "got it" but you should check it out.

4. "lez side story" by hedia maron & faye driscoll- also HIlarious. fruits. queers. dancing. chains. a must see for the whole family.

the last thing i did on friday was facilitate the race caucus. now this was requested by jolie harris last year at winnipeg and i said i was interested then. so for the last few months six of us (jolie harris, dd chandler? cummings?, sand chang, mel corn, matt richardson and myself) have been discussing how to best organize a race caucus at IDKE. we decided that splitting into affinity groups based on racial identity for the first thirty minutes and then spending the next thirty minutes together as an entire group was best. each group had a set of questions they were to discuss.

Topics for the people of color affinity group:
• How do we use our performances to explore race? What does that look like, and why is it important?
• As audience members and performers, when have we been offended? When have we decided to leave spaces because of fucked up race politics on and/or off stage? How have we confronted others who participate in the offensive performance, or if we haven't, what are the barriers?
• What does being "colorblind" mean? Is it possible?
• Is it okay for people of color to appropriate music by people of color from a different racial group? How does power play into this?
What is the difference between impersonation and interpretation? Can a performer responsibly and respectfully do cross-racial performances?
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Topics for the white affinity group:
• Why do we adopt racial tropes/stereotypes in our performances? What are the alternatives?
• What does being “colorblind” mean? Is it possible?
• How can white people use gender/drag performance to intentionally explore race? What does it look like? Why is it important?
• If we see someone in our troupe or on stage doing a performance that makes us uncomfortable because of the race issues involved, what can we do about it?
What is the difference between impersonation and interpretation? Can a performer responsibly and respectfully do cross-racial performances?

now first of all, i thought we would have MAYBE 25 people at this session. while it was scheduled when nothing else was scheduled, i figured it was the end of the day and really i thought not that many folks care to talk about race, racism and how both intersect with IDKE. i was wrong. we had probably between 75 and 100 people there. and lots of them were white folks (something i also didn't expect).

mel and i facilitated the white affinity group. it went pretty well. there were a lot more people than we anticipated, so i did not have enough handouts and i think that it may have been easier to handle and hear if we broke into two groups of white people. the feedback i got privately from some of the folks in the group was that as facilitators, we should have taken those particpants who said problematic things to task. i think they were probably right and i am trying to figure out a way to incorporate more of a "talk back" structure when we do this again. i do think that most of the things i did not agree with that were said, were in some way addressed by other members of the white affinity group, so that, to me, is good, but i agree that sometimes, things that may be hurtful or violent to others sometimes need to be identified as such by the folks facilitating.

the most interesting thing (to me) of the "coming back together" part was the number of white people in the room who vocalized how they felt tension in the room. i didn't feel the tension, but i think if people did, its a good thing. i think the tension is that "uncomfortable-ness" that we white folks have when our race privilege is exposed. to me, that tension was a sign of transformation. of movement. so i welcome it.

a lot of the participants thanked us as facilitators for putting on the caucus and said they were really glad it has become an institutionalized part of the conference. while it was exhausting and frustrating at some points, i mostly felt exhiliarated and blessed to be amongst so many amazing people who were willing to engage in hard discussions about race, racism, power and privilege. i felt humbled and proud to be a part of the IDKE community.

ok this has gotten way too long and i have to head out to meet someone for drinks. i am going to have to post about dragdom tomorrow. there will be pictures, i promise.